Well, here I am again.  Miss me, anyone?  I thought not.

It seemed like things were going well.  I thought I was doing better

Come to find out, I was wrong.

March has been a bad month for me for a long time.  My father’s whole fucked up death and afterwards happened in March.  St Patrick’s Day, to be specific.  I used to avoid green on purpose and dare anyone to pinch me.  It used to be really bad.  It seemed to me this year that things were going swimmingly.  I wasn’t fixated.  My mind didn’t drift back.  Again, though, I was wrong.  Meg informed me that I did go off my rocker, pretty much from February to April.  I started feeling a little better in May.  I pretty much had stopped eating.  I was back down to the 160’s.  I stopped sleeping.  I stopped lifting weights and throwing darts and taking walks.  I didn’t realize it as it was happening, only in hindsight.

I was teaching a class at a local mission and that was taken from me.  There were “going in a different direction.”

So….pretty much….here I am….”stuck in the middle again.”

I have a new psychologist.  Br. Bob.  He’s a cool old dude.  Very frumpy, as cool old psychologists should be.  He’s helping me see some interesting concepts.  A funny thing happened recently.  Dr. Bob knows of my relationship with martial arts and he quote a karate Master, Masumatsu Oyama, to me.  I know of Mas Oyama.  He was my sensai’s sensai.  Funny how things are connected.